![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Entry tags:
What is this?
I am too awake, too aware of all the things that I cannot bear.
Yet I see no future, I care nothing for the past, how can I tell them that this is it?
I don't feel alive nor of a human kind, an other kind or another type, maybe.
I feel so far removed that it is unsettling, to know how separate everything really is.
See everything is energy but nothing is exactly like me, or the same, not that I am special just different in some kind of way.
Nothing is special but nothing seems insignificant, everything has a place and time, and yet I feel like I stand outside of it.
It is so sobering that it is startling, I fit nowhere and yet I am here, I am existing right now, and yet I am already dead.
What is this thing that I feel now?
Or is it a feeling now?
I know quite surely that It is both terrifying and freeing.
Yet I see no future, I care nothing for the past, how can I tell them that this is it?
I don't feel alive nor of a human kind, an other kind or another type, maybe.
I feel so far removed that it is unsettling, to know how separate everything really is.
See everything is energy but nothing is exactly like me, or the same, not that I am special just different in some kind of way.
Nothing is special but nothing seems insignificant, everything has a place and time, and yet I feel like I stand outside of it.
It is so sobering that it is startling, I fit nowhere and yet I am here, I am existing right now, and yet I am already dead.
What is this thing that I feel now?
Or is it a feeling now?
I know quite surely that It is both terrifying and freeing.