Well, that should do it!
Jun. 18th, 2025 11:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lavenderfleuretI think I've made all the necessary edits I want to this page.
It is currently 11:31pm on a work night, and I haven't written for my current fanfiction I've been scribbling at for a friend. I have no idea why I'm even writing it. My heart's not in it.
My heart's not in anything, recently.
Even my trip to Japan, a trip that most would covet, feels like a distant memory, like a lifetime long since passed.
Everything feels the same. I cannot let it end this way.
There were a lot of things I (was forced) to learn about myself, while I was there. Among other things:
-> If you see something you like, just get it. You will regret it if you don't. The money will come back.
-> You will embarrass yourself. That's just a part of life. Everyone affected will forget about it, one day.
-> Get out of your comfort zone. For the love of God.
I'm currently in this limbo state. I've realised my life as it stands now, is not what I want. I want to do more, feel more. Be more.
There are many 'firsts' I've yet to have, even at the age of 25.
Nothing appeals to me. But, why not try something new?
Life is such a hassle.
Today, I think I've finalized my order for some proxy shipping items. DHL be damned - I want them. I'll place the order for all the items in the warehouse by the end of June - remind me.
And then, it'll be July...
I hope it rains more, by then.
Good night, and may God be with you.
It is currently 11:31pm on a work night, and I haven't written for my current fanfiction I've been scribbling at for a friend. I have no idea why I'm even writing it. My heart's not in it.
My heart's not in anything, recently.
Even my trip to Japan, a trip that most would covet, feels like a distant memory, like a lifetime long since passed.
Everything feels the same. I cannot let it end this way.
There were a lot of things I (was forced) to learn about myself, while I was there. Among other things:
-> If you see something you like, just get it. You will regret it if you don't. The money will come back.
-> You will embarrass yourself. That's just a part of life. Everyone affected will forget about it, one day.
-> Get out of your comfort zone. For the love of God.
I'm currently in this limbo state. I've realised my life as it stands now, is not what I want. I want to do more, feel more. Be more.
There are many 'firsts' I've yet to have, even at the age of 25.
Nothing appeals to me. But, why not try something new?
Life is such a hassle.
Today, I think I've finalized my order for some proxy shipping items. DHL be damned - I want them. I'll place the order for all the items in the warehouse by the end of June - remind me.
And then, it'll be July...
I hope it rains more, by then.
Good night, and may God be with you.
You are the storm.
Jun. 18th, 2025 09:18 pmlavenderfleuretThis is where you found me.
Wrapped in a cotton sheet, clutching at broken stems of wildflowers and sprigs of lavender. The wind blows over us both, the tempest telling you all that I cannot. Open curtains laced white, billowing in the shape of my heartache.
I waited here for you, waited for the never-ending autumn to finally fall, for winter to come.
I left the window open, so I could see your violet hue, violent as it strikes the land and in the same split, flood the world with rain and reason. My reason.
You are my cold, my comfort.
You are all I need, as I betray the burning sun.
In your frost, I find life.
May this season see us frozen in time...
Wrapped in a cotton sheet, clutching at broken stems of wildflowers and sprigs of lavender. The wind blows over us both, the tempest telling you all that I cannot. Open curtains laced white, billowing in the shape of my heartache.
I waited here for you, waited for the never-ending autumn to finally fall, for winter to come.
I left the window open, so I could see your violet hue, violent as it strikes the land and in the same split, flood the world with rain and reason. My reason.
You are my cold, my comfort.
You are all I need, as I betray the burning sun.
In your frost, I find life.
May this season see us frozen in time...
So, it begins...
Jun. 18th, 2025 09:02 pmlavenderfleuretThis is my first post. I've always had trouble keeping a journal. All my attempts at a physical diary have ended with it tucked away, gathering dust in a drawer. Seeing as I spend 90 percent of my time in front of a screen, this might do the trick.
I do have unfortunate news for my first entry. The necklace I got from Japan broke. It was bound to happen -- the dainty chain, the flimsy quality. Should have invested in a statement piece.
Why the lavender theme? I've been obsessed with lavender scents lately. The colours and scents of wild lavender, clean cotton, the wind billowing through an open curtain on a drizzly Sunday evening.
Oh, and - well - my current "husbando". I feel shy writing his name, so I won't. But I associate him with the colour, the flower - and indeed, that is where "fleuret" comes from.
I've made some tags.
#sylleblossom- journal entry.
#lavender - about RNF.
#baby's breath - creative writing, in any capacity.
#moonflower- fanfiction specifically.
#violet - potentially triggering/mature content.
Yes, I'll be sharing my fanfiction here, too. It's all on AO3, but it's good to get in the habit of archiving. That site has recently encountered some AI scraping scandals.
Well, good night, and may God be with you.
I do have unfortunate news for my first entry. The necklace I got from Japan broke. It was bound to happen -- the dainty chain, the flimsy quality. Should have invested in a statement piece.
Why the lavender theme? I've been obsessed with lavender scents lately. The colours and scents of wild lavender, clean cotton, the wind billowing through an open curtain on a drizzly Sunday evening.
Oh, and - well - my current "husbando". I feel shy writing his name, so I won't. But I associate him with the colour, the flower - and indeed, that is where "fleuret" comes from.
I've made some tags.
#sylleblossom- journal entry.
#lavender - about RNF.
#baby's breath - creative writing, in any capacity.
#moonflower- fanfiction specifically.
#violet - potentially triggering/mature content.
Yes, I'll be sharing my fanfiction here, too. It's all on AO3, but it's good to get in the habit of archiving. That site has recently encountered some AI scraping scandals.
Well, good night, and may God be with you.
